Ever since Anya started school I’ve missed her a lot while she’s out (but of course I enjoy the quiet working time too). It’s dawned on me that she spends so much time at school and that’s a whole chunk of her life I will miss out on – oh how I wish I could be a fly on the wall! Since that’s not happening, the best I can do is to really chat to her about her day but up until recently when I asked her questions I was only getting answers like ‘I don’t know’ or ‘I can’t remember’ or ‘I’m hungry’. Then I read an article (I can’t remember where) that was pretty much saying be very specific with your questions and avoid general questions. Questions like ‘how was your day?’ or ‘what did you do in school today?’ are far too vague for a small child to answer.
So now I have gotten very specific with my questions and I get so much more from her. I also space out the questions over a period of time so that she doesn’t feel like she’s getting the third degree! I usually ask her things like:
1. What was the best thing you did today?
2. What was the worst thing about today?
3. Who would you like to have over next for a play date? (this usually changes on a daily basis but gives me an idea of who she played with on that day).
4. What was the yummiest thing on the menu? And the yuckiest?
5. Did you hear a new word today? What was it?
6. Did you fall over today? (this gets her telling me all the details if it happened but if not she will tell me about her friend who may have fallen over).
7. Who was the naughtiest in class today?
8. Did you do anything kind today? Was anybody kind to you?
9. Which lesson did you like the most?
With questions like these, Anya really starts thinking about her day and coming out with more and more little bits and pieces and we end up having a nice long conversation. I not only find out what she’s been up to but also how she felt about it all. Some days she’s full of laughter and comes out with the funniest little things and other days she’s more serious or subdued – but each day I get a little glimpse in to her world, how she sees things in it and how she’s feeling about it – what could be better than that? It’s probably the best bit of my day. We all want to know the smallest details of what our kids are up to while they’re away from us so I’d love to hear how you get your kids to tell you about their day? Do you have a creative way to get them to talk? Does it get harder as they get older? I would love to hear in the comments.
Have a wonderful weekend filled with happy little conversations – nomita x
sonia January 23, 2015 6:12PM
so useful. I have the answers like “I don’t know” or “nothing” all the time I ask 😉
ebabee likes January 23, 2015 9:24PM
Glad you found it useful – I used to get those answers all the time and found it so frustrating!
International Elf Service January 23, 2015 11:36PM
That’s a great list of questions. Definitely good to ask them in kids style rather than grown up style! Love it!
ebabee likes January 24, 2015 10:45AM
Hope it works – so nice to be able to get more info from them.
Thefolia January 24, 2015 1:10AM
The school is really great about sending emails with pictures of what they did that day and so voila I usually have a specific question that triggers a story about the event. Also by seeing what speciality class they have for the day helps with posing questions about that class. There is also a class mom that speaks directly to the teacher & then conveys everything via email for that week. So basically they cannot escape from too many secrets at school. I love how organized they are…my kind of place.
ebabee likes January 24, 2015 10:46AM
Your school sounds great – what a lovely thing to send pics of the day. And to get daily info on the lessons again really helpful. Might suggest some of these ideas to our school.